My life before and after to receive the Holy Spirit

My family had many problems: poverty, debt, fights, separation, a broken home. I was raised in an environment without love, without care and had many problems which were increasing every day.

In my teens, I was very immature, I believed anyone who said: "I love you." I was without direction, without love and sad at the same time. Without any malice, my life was horrible and in my youth it became worse. I started going out with guys and traveling. Some told me they were single but some time later, I would discover they were married men. Men claiming to be passionate, but who really just wanted to take advantage of my body. I entered a world of alcohol and drugs, which only had many disappointments and fake friends. It was all just jealousy, intrigues, and a big emptiness in my heart.

I remember when I would go out Saturday and return Sunday morning, still under the influence of alcohol, feeling an immense sadness in my heart. I had everything that many girls my age wanted: I was in college, I had a good job, my own car and at great sacrifice, I had financial independence. But in reality, I was an empty, unhappy person, something was missing.

On my own one day, I spoke to God: "If there is true happiness would it be possible for the Lord to show me where I can find it?"

One day at home, after returning from a trip to carnival, where I had been thru everything, I was so sad and on the radio I heard the testimony of a former prostitute who said that her life had changed: “I had many men, but was not happy” and she spoke of the change in her life. Then I thought, "If she has found happiness, why can’t I?" and the next day I went to church.

My God, now I remember my first day. After the meeting ended, I spoke to God: "I'm sure this is my place, I have sadness, anxiety, disappointment, emptiness, I am possessed by evil spirits who are doing whatever they want in my life”. Today I remember this with tears in my eyes. It was the beginning of a new life. A life that I had been searching for a long time, but could not find it. I listened to the pastor speak and saw so much love when he spoke. A love that no man showed before, it was the love of God for me.

I decided to give myself completely: body, soul and spirit. In a month I was baptized in the waters and left it all behind: clubs, parties, nightlife. I started going to church every day. I loved being there, I felt better than being at home. The helpers gave me a lot of attention, they were worried about my salvation, true servants who helped me and here I thank each of them.

I continued to persevere and seek a new life. I wanted the Holy Spirit more than anything in my life, with all my strength. Although there were many problems, at that time they did not bother me or upset me. I knew God was watching.

What I wanted most was to have the Spirit of God within me, and three months later I received the Holy Spirit in my life. It was something wonderful and unexpected, unexplainable, something that filled me, made me happy, and I started to realize that what I needed was not a man, or a house, or a wedding, or parents or a stable financial life. What I needed was the Spirit of God within me, it was what I was searching for a long time and I had just found it. It was the happiest day of my life! I left the church singing, wanting to tell everyone of the unconditional love I had found.

Next week, everyone who knew me asked me what was happening. Why was I like that? Why had I changed so much? And I said: "because I found my Lord."

The joy and fulfillment took over me and my only pleasure from that time was to seek his favor, to serve Him...

It was a true conversion, a total change of direction in my life.

The story is long. It is 15 years of service to God, because within six months, I became a helper and my greatest pleasure (which is still today) was to evangelize, care for and talk to those in need, helping people, and the love was growing so much every day until I decided to leave everything: my job, college, my family, everything.

One day I was reading the Bible and meditated on what I read: "The fruit of the righteous is a tree of life, and he who wins souls is wise" so I asked myself: "What good is it that I graduate and become so wise in this world?, if what my God wants for me is that I win souls ..." So I dropped everything to serve my Lord in the altar, and what joy...
Aahhh, what a day!

All these years, there has not been a lack of reasons and struggles to make me give up. Walking with God is not living in a sea of roses, but to pass the sea and not be overwhelmed by it, it’s not looking back and remaining. It’s to look at the cross, to only see the origin of our faith and not at men. And only with this spirit that comes from God himself, can we stand firm and unshaken in any situation of this world. But I always try to live my first love. To me, this is one of the secrets to staying with the Lord Jesus. Love him with all your strength, thoughts and daily actions, exhaling his perfume to anyone who is around us.

First of all, I give thanks to the Lord with all my heart. The pastor who was there, living in sacrifice to save me. The helpers who left their homes and their lives to take care of me. Because if not for them, I don’t know what would have become of me and certainly I would have lost my salvation.

"For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord." (Romans 8:38)